Skin Deep

Yesterday, Chris and I decided to forego the movie theater and went to Voorhees Town Center instead. Instead of going to Elena Wu as we originally planned, we went to Catelli Duo, the newest wine bar in the area.  I had a plain sleeveless black dress on, had no make up or accessories, and had my hair up in a bun. The only splash of color I had was my pink shoulder bag.

The place was pretty flashy and had a bunch of ex-yuppie Gen-Xers in khaki shorts and glamorously accessorized millennials my age and younger. Chris was dressed exactly like the Gen-Xers so he looked fine but I stuck out like a sore thumb. I only paid attention to Chris, the food, drinks and the bartender so I didn’t really focus on the other patrons. Chris is much more observant and told me that:

  1. People looked because I was the only Asian in the place. Not surprising since Voorhees and its surrounding towns are predominantly white.
  2. The girl behind me looked me over from head to toe and turned dismissively. I said I noticed that one but didn’t mind. I explained that pretty girls hate other pretty girls.

Humble moment. 😀

It did make me think. Have I been more relaxed about how I dress and look since my marriage? I think I used to be more OC about my appearance.

Some women at work told me that I no longer need to worry about my looks since I’m already married. I objected and said that married women have to make more effort — we’ll be the last person our husbands will ever sleep with so we shouldn’t let ourselves go. The same applies to men. I see so many men who gain 100 pounds and get massive Dad-bods after marriage and kids. I told Chris that I liked him thin. I also asked him to let me know if he thinks that I need to lose weight. He has not said anything so far and he continues to tell me how beautiful I am everyday. Personally, I think he’s biased but I do appreciate it.

Love, respect and devotion are essential in a marriage. But are looks just as important?

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