I was given an odd gift to welcome the new year: a ZEP (Zit of Enormous Proportions). The kind that makes you feel you’ve grown a second head and everything else that looks nice about you mean nothing because everyone’s eyes are automatically drawn to that dratted ZEP. Its aura struts along cockily, leaving the rest of you to die in shame.
I almost didn’t go out last night because of it but felt guilty because I promised Jovett that I’d show up so I troweled on a ton of font de teint #4 on the ZEP in a vain attempt to minimize its presence. I felt like growling every time a camera flashed because those people will keep those pictures and every time they look at it they’ll remember me as the girl with the ZEP. So if you value your pricey lenses, keep those Nikons away from me until next week.