This afternoon, a few minutes after 5pm, Tita Villa approached me and asked if I was overworked.
I just felt so pathetic. I swore I wouldn’t let something as unimportant as W-O-R-K get me this down but I’ve just been so overwhelmed over the past few weeks. And I felt that I’ve been letting people and myself down. The work itself is easy, it’s just the volume that’s giving me a hard time. It’s just too much, and when I said I didn’t think I could handle the additional coverage (my colleague went on leave) just after I’ve finished a previous one, no one listened!
During my last evaluation they said I needed to speak up, tell the bosses if I was getting more than I could/should handle because I tended to keep problems to myself. Well, I did speak up, and no one believed me.
I have so many things hanging right now and I know I’ve disappointed some people who used to believe I was Ms. Super Efficient. But seriously, this time, I’ve taken on too much. And it’s affecting my temper, my health, and my performance. I’m becoming a bitch, I lose my patience, and I dream about work. I’m not even supposed to be stressed! I’m an epileptic for f#ck’s sakes! Do they want me to have a humongous seizure everyday???
I need a vacation, but I don’t take days off because I can’t afford to even if I have so many unused leave days. I really can’t wait ’til April.