Bubbly Bitch

Alet told me that among the three of us (including Trish), I was the girly-girliest. I was quite dumbfounded. I’ve never considered myself to be a girly-girl. 😀 Is it true? Am I made of sugar, spice, and everything nice? :0

I was a gloomy, geeky, sarcastic, hateful teenager! What happened from 13 to 23?

So I asked her: “If I am a girly-girl, then why the hell are we friends?”

Her reply? “By the time I found out, I liked you already.”

If we were the Powerpuff Girls, I would be (gads!) Bubbles, Trish would be Blossom, and Alet would be Buttercup. I’m not dumb, but I’m honest enough to admit that I can have spaced-out blonde moments. And we’d rename ourself Bitch, Bitchier, and Bitchiest. Wehehe.

= =

I’m ashamed to admit that my Dad can be the king of chaunivist pigs sometimes. He keeps on cracking jokes about women fawning all over men, women being secretly malandi (slutty/flirty), women being pretentious, etc.

Most of the time I just shush him and say Shut Up when we’re in public but there are times when I get really mad and snap “Why do you think of women that way!?”

And he simply replied that due to his pre-marriage experiences, he has proved his theories to be correct.

And, being the honest daughter than I am, I told Daddy exactly about how MEAN girls can be.

  1. We’re not dumb, cheap, or silly. We just think a lot of guys are.
  2. We shop and dress nicely because we want to. It may look attractive to men but women are true narcissists at heart. We love to preen at our reflections and our main objective is to please ourselves and make us happy. This explains our obsession on shoes, clothes, weight, and hair.
  3. Girls are meaner than we look. We like to make fun of pretentious men, especially the testosterone types who strut like peacocks, feeling like they’re God’s gifts to women when they actually look like the “before” models (as in Before and After the procedure) for Svenson ads.

    So the next time you see two or three girls smiling at you across a crowded room, don’t immediately assume that we’re wanting to throw ourselves at you with the slightest invitation. Most likely, we’re laughing at the way your mini-paunch bulges over your tacky belt buckle while you struggle to breathe in your tight, trendy shirt.

  4. Men with carpets of body hair are disgusting. I’m so sorry if you’re born that way. But if you honestly believe that girls faint and giggle over a guy in shorts with two pairs of long legs that are totally covered in curly hair that you could hardly see a square millimeter of skin, then think again. Because you’re wrong. The same goes for that thick chest hair and back hair. Button up your shirt, man! If we go to such lengths to shave or get Brazilians (waxes not men), then you better make an effort as well.

Ohhh. Lots of workload puts me in a mood. 🙂

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