I saw part of the title on JZ‘s blog and instantly fell in love with it. Somehow, she got it right.
Ten years ago, when I was thirteen, I wanted to grow up so quickly. I envied all the girls with long, perfect hair, believing that it was a prerequisite for beauty. I wanted to be pretty, and I longed to be as cosmopolitan as all the other girls my age who found it oh-so-easy to get everything they wanted. I was the kid no one would take a second look at; the sister-type. The ultimate mean-time girl.
After having and living through everything I thought I wanted, and seeing myself far removed from the person I used to be, I find myself envying the kid I was a long time ago. People put too much importance and glamour on experience that they forget that ignorance is not just bliss. There is a goodness in innocence that we lose over time if we’re not careful.
Love could be good, sweet, and fulfilling. But it could also fool you into being someone you’re not (or accept situations you do not deserve). It could break through the toughest resistance, bring out the best and the worst in us, confuse the smartest people, and change us even when we least expect it.
I’ve had a good relationship that didn’t work out and another that was pointless from the start. I’ve had others that fizzled before they even started. But, strangely, I appreciate all of them. I just wish they feel the same way. 🙂
Let me end this post with a nice Valentine story I picked up from someone, especially dedicated to the single or soon-to-be single person.
A boy told a girl that he loved her, and she responded joyfully in kind as she waited almost five months just to hear him say those words. They spent a few blissful days with their newfound awareness, and she was convinced that he was The One and not just Someone. He had to go away for a few days, but it was all right, they could call each other. One night, she called to say hello and told him, jokingly, about someone who tried to hit on her earlier (the boy from work asked if she had a boyfriend). And before she could even finish her story, her supposed love-of-her-life cut in and said, “But you don’t, right? You don’t have a boyfriend.” She asked why, confused. And he answered that he had no right to tie her down.
After a while, seeing that she was in a dead-end situation, and that no rationalizing and daydreaming would ever make the imaginary a reality, she bluntly told him that he would have to stop seeing her, said good night, and ended the conversation with a Happy Valentines Day greeting.
Moral of the story? We want someone who won’t just love us, but will seize the right to have us completely. This, of course, goes the other way as well. You can’t have your cake and eat it, too.
Otherwise, singlehood isn’t too bad. Single girls are always prettier than attached ones. 🙂