A Sense of Entitlement: Spoiled Children and the Frustrated Parents Who Made Them

Tricia’s post reminded me of how the younger generation feels as if they’re entitled to everything: every comfort, every benefit… everything has to be provided to them. I’ve seen this attitude from a people who are just a few years younger than me and teenagers alike. Given the more recent attitude of giving young kids expensive toys the whole year round, I assume this sense of entitlement will get worse and a whole generation of parents will regret spoiling their kids after 10 years.

Just like Trish and her siblings, me and my siblings have to work for and deserve every toy and book that we got. If my rank on the honor roll slipped, I didn’t get any Nancy Drews or Enid Blytons that  quarter. My brother had less than stellar marks last semester so aside from the essentials, he didn’t get special stuff. No Playstation Portable either even if he has been asking for it for a year. As for my 5-year-old sister, she receives age-appropriate toys even if she has amazing grades. We refuse to buy her Wii because more gaming will cut into on her study time. She asked for a netbook to play her favorite games but we said no, too. She can borrow Mom’s laptop if needed. The point is, we and a lot of kids who grew up like us were raised to learn the value of hard work and earning something through one’s achievements. Our parents won’t give us toys and entertainment reading material if we slacked through years of school. Special occasions like birthdays and Christmas were the only exceptions to that rule.

But the kids these days… *shakes head* I see kids who get toys every week or every month regardless of their behavior or performance. There are young children who have the latest expensive techie toys and cellular phones. From an early age, they were not taught to value their parents’ hard-earned income and think that it’s their parents’ responsibility to keep them as spoiled and satisfied as a rich sheikh. Love isn’t bought and character isn’t built through pricey toys, even if you feel guilty about not spending enough time with them because you were too busy with work.

I feel sorry for the parents who later complain that their college-age kid dropped out of school or refused to work and earn their keep even if their parents already put them through university.  After all, why should they exert any effort? They know that that can get what they want no matter what. And when they don’t get what they want in situations and places outside their homes, they gripe and whine like there’s no tomorrow.

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2 thoughts on “A Sense of Entitlement: Spoiled Children and the Frustrated Parents Who Made Them

  1. Hello, I am a frustrated parent of two spoiled older children. Our son is 28 and our daughter is 38 and believe it or not we are still having to deal with their selfishness. Our daughter lives in our home with our grandaughter and she cannot help our or even cook a meal. I am through the roof over it as it’s been 10 years of this. She did marry but after one year called it quits – daddy paid for the divorce and we have been helping ever since. She can’t get the proper job and won’t take what ever is available as it’s not good enough for a college graduate.

    Our self indulgent son calls to talk only of himself and talks for hours about his problems and can’t even muster and how are you and mean it. I put up with it because I felt that he would someday grow out of it, but have had more than enough of this selfishness.

    I blame their selfishness on my husbands willingness to pay for all of their needs – cars, insurance, divorces, rent etc. He has tried to win them over for a lack of hands on interest in their lives. I have been the sole nurturer. Now that (we) have stopped paying and cosigning we have been all but dropped from their social calenders.

    Never did get birthday presents or cards for different holidays. It’s really a pitty that you can give your lives and everything you have to your children only to have them turn out to be totally selfish. My childrens main concerns are who will have to care for us. Especially my daughter who we have completely cared for for the past 10 years.

    I would tell anyone not to start providing and providing what your child should learn to provide for themselves. It is the biggest mistake that you will pay for horribly.

    RS

    • Wow… Rebecca, thanks for sharing. I really hope that your daughter would learn to be independent soon and that your son would realize how valuable you and your husband are. Take care and hang in there.

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